Ето два списъка по въпросът. Първият не съм сигурен от къде го взех. Може някой да ми го е пратил или да съм го видял из блоговете. Ако някой си го познае, нека да ми пише и ще го линкна. Според voxy, статията е сканирана от българското издание на Maxim.

Само да отбележа – и в двата списъка половината неща са абсолютна глупост по мое мнение. За сметка на това ракията наистина е лек, шкембето наистина помага и няма нищо лошо да имам зеле в мазата. В Германия даже исках да го направя, но приятелите ми ме спряха навреме. Сигурно ХЕИ-то им щеше да ме изхвърли от апартамента веднага.

Вторият списък е от страница във Facebook със същото име. Тъй като са над 150, няма да ги превеждам.

1. Your 15 year old sister can out-drink any American.
2. At your wedding you know only about a third of the guests.
3. At least one of your friends’ nickname/name is „Sasho“.
4. Your father calls you a dummy for not knowing how to do something he can’t do either.
5. You drive a better car than your parents.
6. There is a 120-gallon barrel of wine and cabbage in your garage.
7. There is more alcohol in your liquor cabinet than at the local bar.
8. You are 18 years old but your parents still call you by your sibling’s or pet’s name.
9. You can hear your dad snoring from across the street.
10. Your baba and diado live in your basement.
11. Your dad carries around enough money to buy a car.
12.Both your parents had to walk to school barefoot in the snow, 5 km uphill – both ways – and over rocks and they make sure to remind you every time you get in your car.
13. There is at least one relative that your family refuses to talk to.
14. Being someone’s best man really has no meaning.
15. When you make jokes based on your own tragedy.
16. Your church has a fully loaded bar.
17. You don’t want to have or do any business with Bulgarians.
18. Your parents have a shot of rakiya for breakfast.
19. You started to drink at the age of 12.
20. It takes over 8 years to finish college.
21. You have a Bulgarian cross, flag, or icon, hanging from your rearview mirror.
22. You base your whole life on the fortune in your coffee cup.
23. You live with your mom and dad until you are married.
24. Your mom tells you not to sit on cement or your ovaries will freeze.
25. There is a slab of fat in your fridge called ‘slanina.’
26. When your baba will not accept the fact that you’re not hungry.
27. You go to a restaurant and you bring your own drinks.
28. You live for the annual soccer tournament.
29. When your grandma insists that farting is healthy.
30. All of your elderly acquaintances are scared of drafts.
31. When you can hear your parents talking and you are across the street.
32. When you’re a girl, and you dye your hair no other color than burgundy.
33. Everyone is sure you’re Greek or Italian.
34. No one has ever pronounced your name right, and every kid on the block has a different nickname for it.
35. When you can always smell garlic on your parents breath and they insist that is kills bacteria.
36. When no matter how old you are, your parents never say you’re right.
37. When you’re 6’5 and 150 kg and your parents still think you are too skinny.
38. When you’re hungry, and then you go and buy a pack of smokes.
39. When your baba would rather walk 5 miles to the grocery store instead of pay a quarter to take the bus.
40. When you have a chicken running in your back yard.
41. You have a shot of rakiya followed by cherno kafe and a pack of Marlboro for breakfast.
42. You sport the latest Nike and Adidas outfits but have never exercised in your life.
43. You always have the latest mobile phone on the market.
44. You can spend 3 hrs in a Cafe drinking the same cup of coffee.
45. When your parents call relatives in Bulgaria and they have to shout to be heard.
46. As soon as you tell a neighbor you’re Bulgarian they usually scream STOICKOV with a weird accent.
47. When you’re married with kids and your mother still insists on cooking for you.
48. When you beg a friend who’s going back to Bulgaria to buy you some „good“ cigarettes.
49. You know you’re Bulgarian when you’re 25, live on your own, and still sneak up the stairs when you get home at six in the morning.
50. Your parents insist that piling blankets on you body is the way to cure your 102 degree fever.
51. When you started going to clubs when you were 14.
52. When you think chalga is good music.
53. When you are never certain whether to stay abroad or return to Bulgaria.
54. You know you’re Bulgarian when your dad thinks everyone in China has a black belt.
55. When people still think that you are from Bolivia no matter how many times you say you’re from Bulgaria.
56. When your parents’ friends have no shame in telling you you’ve gained weight.
57. You know you’re Bulgarian when all you have to do is sniffle and your parents say „uh-huh“ and start yelling at you for getting sick.
58. You move next door to a family member to be closer but then end up not talking to each other because of something stupid you said when you were drunk.
59. Despite the fact that you are broke you always have a pack of cigarettes.
60. YOU KNOW YOU’RE BULGARIAN WHEN YOU HAVE RUN AWAY FROM BULGARIA AND STILL SAY IT’S THE BEST PLACE TO LIVE……
61. You don’t like Americans – maikaim deiba
62. You sneak rakiya in plastic bottles hidden in your suitcase when coming back to the states.
63. When non-bulgarians ask yo what your nickname is you don’t tell them because it is nowhere close to your real name.
64. Your grandparents always assume you’re hungry and cook for you despite having told them twenty thousand times that you are not hungry.
65. Your grandma always insists on rubbing rakia on your back when you have a cold.
66. You like queuing for no reason.
67. You think washing the dishes in a cheap restaurant in America is the way to success.
68. You think that everyone who lives abroad is rich.
69. You think that every man who takes care of himself is gay.
70. You eat bread with everything, even with pasta.
71. You’d rather not eat meat, than bread.
72. Everything your grandma cooks is different types of stews.
73. Your family thinks that foreign cuisine is bad and unhealthy, but they still eat lard, „slanina“ and „djumerki/pruzhki“ and drink questionable home-made alcohol.
74. You like roasted sunflower seeds.
75. You think a dish cannot be too sweet or too salty.
76. Your grandparents prepare their own vinegar.
77. In your local supermarket there are no pickles or tinned fruit because everyone makes their own.
78. Your neighbourhood looks like a Native American reservation when people start making „zimnina.“
79. You think that McDonald’s, KFC and Burger King are actually proper restaurants.
80. The prices there are higher than in normal restaurants, just because the junk food they serve is American, hence more expensive.
81. You’d try to fix something yourself, despite having no idea how to do it, rather than call a technician.
82. You still carry lots of cash, even though you have several bank cards.
83. You don’t buy fruit and vegetables because you grandparents produce them, even though they live a 100 km away from you.
84. Your parents insist that you respect all your relatives, even the ones you don’t know.
85. Your parents make up the guest list for you wedding.
86. They don’t invite any of your friends because they don’t like them.
87. Your grandparents get angry when you tell them you are not going to marry your boyfriend/girlfriend but still live with them and have children.
88. You are expected to name your kids after your parents.
89. When you go on holiday you call everyone to say good-bye.
90. When someone calls to tell you they are going on holiday you get angry and think they just want to show off.
91. You are not from Sofia, you hate everyone who is.
92. You are from Sofia, you hate everyone who isn’t.
93. You immediately start swearing when you hear the word „Gypsy“.
94. You always vote for the same party and then blame it for everything.
95. The local traffic police hide in the bushes alongside the road.
96. They try and fine you just for the sake of it.
97. You are an expert in using illegal software.
98. What most of your friends do for a living is illegal.
99. Your surname ends in either „-ov“ or „-ev“.
100. You get annoyed when someone asks you why that is so.
101. Your first name ends in „-a“ if you are a girl.
102. You have at least one relative called Ivan or Maria.
103. Nobody understands the origin of your nickname.
104. You are named after one of your grandparents.
105. Instead of a middle name, you have another surname.
106. Nobody understands when you nod.
107. Everyone thinks you are shouting when talking on the phone to your parents.
108. You say „tz“ instead of „no“.
109. You put words such as „be“, „ue“ and „ma“ at the end of the sentences.
110. The newspapers you read have a naked woman and a Sudoku puzzle on the back page.
111. You believe that God is a Bulgarian and Emil Kostadinov is the Messiah.
112. You believe that Macedonia is not a country and Macedonian is not a language.
113. You think that Greeks are stupid and shouldn’t be richer than you.
114. You hate all your neighbours.
115. You still invite them for a drink just to start up a fight.
116. You prefer your neighbours’ suffering more than your own happiness.
117. You know more than 20 words for „being drunk“.
118. You know more than 20 words for „f*ck“.
119. You express your happiness by swearing.
120. You swear for no reason.
121. You think something is stupid when you don’t understand it.
122. You know how to make „rakia“ at home.
123. You believe it’s better than a 12-year-old single malt Scotch.
124. Your biggest fear is having to pay more for something than others.
125. You have bought something really cheap and spend twice as much repairing it.
126. You celebrate Christmas together with Western Europe, but Easter with Eastern.
127. Everyone’s first word is „Stoichkov“, when you mention where you are from.
128. You believe that everything state-owned should be broken.
129. You believe that everyone except for you should share their possessions.
130. You blame the failure of your favourite Bulgarian football team on the referee.
131. You hate either Levski Sofia or CSKA Sofia.
132. You still love football more, even though the volleyball team is amazing.
133. You have a professional’s knowledge of wrestling and weightlifting.
134. You believe that the Bulgarian weightlifters are the only ones not to use doping.
135. You pride yourself with knowing how yoghurt is made.
136. You actually have no idea how it is made.
137. You claim that a Bulgarian invented the computer.
138. You know that he was actually half-American and never lived in Bulgaria.
139. You eat „shkembe chorba“ for breakfast.
140. You believe „pacha“ is tasty.
141. You drink beer for breakfast.
142. You are taught to eat ice cream only in summer.
143. Your mom and grandma shout at you when you eat it in winter.
144. You have „boza“ or „ayran“ with „banitsa“ as a snack.
145. You like pork intestines boiled and stuffed with „slanina“ and meat.
146. Your grandma cooks for 10 people, although there are only 4 people in the house.
147. She gets worried if you don’t get a second helping.
148. She gets annoyed when you don’t wake up early just to have breakfast.
149. The TV channels at home show at least 3 South American soap operas per day.
150. Your grandma watches all of them.
151. You know who Azis and Slavi Trifonov are.
152. You care about Eurovision.
153. You care about Big Brother.
154. You care about Music Idol.
155. You always vote for the Balkan nations at Eurovision, despite actually hating them.
156. You believe that blond highlights go well in your extremely black hair.
157. You need to wear make up even if you just go out to throw out the rubbish.
158. You believe that being hairy is a sign of masculinity.
159. You say „Chestita banya!“ every time someone’s had a shower.
160. You never get a haircut in winter, because you don’t want to catch a cold.
161. You think that a Moskvich with curtains on the back windows is cool.
162. You believe paying taxes and licences is unnecessary.
163. You will pay more to avoid paying them.

Списъци като последният съм виждал много и за различни националности. Много от точките се повтарят дословно, което ме кара да мисля, че някой е направил генератор. Не съм го намерил още, но може би има стотици такива точки и само си избираш какво е характерно за твоят народ и ти дава такъв списък. Сравних нашият с този, който македонците са приготвили, и почти съвпадат. Да се чуди човек.

[tags]българин, списък, характеристики[/tags]